After a prolonged period of speculation and uncertainty, Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott made a significant announcement approximately a year and a half ago that sent shockwaves through their fanbase: they are officially divorcing after nearly two decades of marriage. This decision marks a pivotal moment in both their lives, highlighting the challenges of maintaining a relationship in the public eye.

In an emotional Instagram post dated June 17, 2023, McDermott expressed his sadness, stating, “It’s with great sadness and a very very heavy heart that after 18 years together and 5 amazing children, that @torispelling and I have decided to go our separate ways, and start a new journey of our own.” This heartfelt message underscored the complexities of their relationship and the love they still share for their children, despite their decision to part ways.

Tori Spelling attends the premiere of Freeform’s “Cruel Summer” Season 2 at Grace E. Simons Lodge on May 31, 2023. (Photo Credit: David Livingston/Getty Images)

What led to this decision and why did Spelling delay the inevitable separation? Questions linger about her choice to remain with McDermott, especially following his infidelity. These inquiries delve into the deeper emotional landscape of their marriage, and Spelling herself has provided some insight into her thought process.

During a candid discussion on the December 10 episode of the Misspelling podcast, Spelling elaborated on her motivations: “On my part, at least, the want of kids.” She explained that her desire for her children to have both parents together contributed significantly to her hesitation in making a more decisive choice. Her reflections reveal the profound impact parental dynamics have on family structure and the emotional toll it can take on one’s mental health.

Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott attend Fox Winter TCA at The Fig House on February 06, 2019. (Photo Credit: Amy Sussman/Getty Images)

Many individuals find themselves staying in unhappy marriages for the sake of their children, hoping to shield them from the emotional fallout of separation. However, it became increasingly evident to observers that the relationship between Spelling and McDermott was on a downward trajectory. In a moment of introspection, McDermott acknowledged his responsibility for the turmoil in their marriage, expressing regret over the pain he caused Spelling.

Reflecting on his struggles with addiction, he stated, “All Tori’s ever done to this day is want me to be happy and healthy and I inflicted a lot of damage and pain on that woman.” His candid admission sheds light on the intricate layers of their relationship, revealing how personal battles can ripple through a family dynamic.

“Alcohol made me feel good enough. I started feeling good enough until it got to a point where it didn’t – it ended up in isolation,” McDermott shared, recalling how his dependence on alcohol spiraled out of control. He described the painful reality of being physically present but emotionally absent, drinking heavily while his family remained just out of reach. This stark confession highlights the devastating effects addiction can have on relationships and family life.

Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott attend UCLA Mattel Children’s Hospital’s 20th Annual “Party on the Pier” at Pacific Park – Santa Monica Pier on November 3, 2019 in Santa Monica, California. (Photo by Sarah Morris/Getty Images for UCLA Mattel Children’s Hospital)

As Spelling reflects on her past decisions, she understands that her intentions to prioritize her children may have been misaligned. She shared insights about her upbringing, noting that her own parents, Candy and the late Aaron Spelling, shared a long-lasting marriage that influenced her perspective on family unity.

“My parents were married over 25 years, up until my dad passed,” she recalled, explaining how their relationship shaped her belief that maintaining a two-parent household was paramount. She believed that keeping their father in the same house, despite the ongoing issues between her and McDermott, was in their best interest. However, she now recognizes that this mindset may have inadvertently caused more harm than good for her children’s emotional well-being.

Tori Spelling, Liam McDermott, Dean McDermott, and guests attend the 2023 iHeartRadio ALTer EGO at The Kia Forum on January 14, 2023. (Photo Credit: Momodu Mansaray/Getty Images)

The former couple shares five children: Liam, 17, Stella, 16, Hattie, 13, Finn, 12, and Beau, 7. Spelling has expressed gratitude that they managed to navigate their issues in the past, as she believes it ultimately led to the birth of their youngest child.

Reflecting on their tumultuous journey, she stated, “I think he and I both were in a place where we might have separated or divorced before Beau was born,” emphasizing the weight of that decision. She added, “But we worked on our relationship, stayed together and I’ll never regret not leaving then. I’m sure he wouldn’t either because we wouldn’t have had Beau.” This acknowledgment highlights the bittersweet nature of their relationship, as they grapple with the complexities of love, family, and personal growth.