Before the 90 Days: Niles Faces Impending Disaster
90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days star Niles Valentine has made a significant decision to agree to marry during his inaugural trip to Ghana, but this choice warrants careful reconsideration. Initially, when Niles and his partner Matilda Nti joined the 90 Day Fiancé franchise, Niles expressed a preference for just an engagement followed by a traditional knocking ceremony. In his confessional, he emphasized that this trip should primarily focus on getting to know Matilda better and assessing whether marriage would be the right path for them. This perspective underscores the importance of understanding and connection before taking such a monumental step.
Niles also indicated the necessity of having sufficient funds to cover wedding expenses, a concern that is entirely reasonable. Nevertheless, he is now confronted with the reality of needing to pay a bride price of $400 during this trip. While his intentions to make Matilda happy are commendable, I believe Niles should take a moment to step back and reassess his priorities. His intense focus on pleasing Matilda could ultimately jeopardize his own happiness and future well-being.
Niles Valentine Must Cultivate Honesty in His Relationship
A key issue that raises concern is Niles’ apparent lack of transparency with Matilda. It is important to recognize that Niles’ autism may lead him to mask certain aspects of his identity and uncomfortable truths. Nonetheless, he has withheld critical information from Matilda, such as his job loss and his current financial struggles. He also failed to communicate his reluctance to rush into marriage during this trip, along with not being open about his family’s lack of support. Transparency is crucial in any relationship, particularly when significant life decisions are at stake.
I genuinely sympathize with Niles, acknowledging that difficult conversations can be quite challenging to initiate. However, for a relationship built on trust and authenticity to thrive, it’s essential for Niles to adopt a more open and honest approach. His tendency to postpone these discussions until the last moment tends to escalate Matilda’s distress, creating unnecessary tension that could have been alleviated earlier. If this pattern continues, it may be beneficial for the couple to take some time apart to reflect on their relationship dynamics and individual goals.
Niles Should Reaffirm His Original Engagement Plan for Greater Clarity
Initially, Niles intended to propose during this trip and to return later for the wedding when he was in a stronger financial position. This rationale is sound as it demonstrates a thoughtful approach to planning a future together. Niles aimed to provide Matilda with the dream wedding she envisioned, while also ensuring he had sufficient time to evaluate whether this was the right commitment for him. Unfortunately, after a conversation with Mr. Arc, their plans shifted dramatically, with Niles now feeling pressured to marry during this visit. Given the abrupt changes in their plans, I believe it is crucial for Niles to revert to his original engagement plan.
Upon agreeing to marry, Niles discovered he needed to pay a bride price of $400. After withdrawing funds, he found himself with only about $100 remaining. This situation feels like a clear indication that he should reconsider his decision. Niles’ initial instincts were correct, and postponing the wedding would provide Matilda with the opportunity to reflect on her own feelings, while allowing Niles the time he needs to save up for a more secure future. Ultimately, returning to his initial plan could serve the couple well.
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Ultimately, I strongly advocate against making hasty decisions, especially when those choices are influenced by external pressures. It seems that Mr. Arc and Matilda may have pressured Niles into marrying on his first trip, leading him to concede for the sake of others’ happiness. Niles’ original plan appeared to be rational and consistent with the experiences of other cast members from the series. While his intentions are undoubtedly well-meaning, I fear that he may inadvertently create larger issues as a result of this rushed decision. Had their initial interactions been more positive, I might have been more supportive of this altered course. Given their current situation, I believe it would be beneficial for them to spend some time apart to reassess their individual and shared goals.
90 Day Fiancé and its spin-offs air on TLC, and are available to stream on Max in the U.S.
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