In a significant turn of events, Tim Lambesis, the lead vocalist of As I Lay Dying, has conducted his first interview following the departure of four of his former bandmates back in October. This unexpected wave of exits included Ryan Neff, Ken Susi, Nick Pierce, tour manager Alex Kendrick, and longtime guitarist Phil Sgrosso. While their statements surrounding their decisions were largely vague, some band members expressed mutual concerns about disturbing “patterns of behavior” that led to their departure. With this exit, Lambesis found himself as the sole remaining member of the band, raising questions about the future of As I Lay Dying.

Shortly after these departures, two videos of Lambesis and his wife, Dany, surfaced online, showcasing a heated argument where Lambesis exhibited troubling behavior. In response to the videos, Lambesis issued a statement revealing that he had sought a restraining order against Dany due to alleged domestic and verbal abuse. He accused her of releasing the videos as retaliation for his decision to file for divorce, further complicating the already tumultuous situation.

Tim Lambesis Reflects on His Journey Since the Band’s Split

In a candid conversation, Tim Lambesis made an appearance on fitness coach Justin Wenzel’s podcast, marking his first public discussion since the upheaval involving both his band and personal life. During this interview, he elaborated on how his turbulent relationship with Dany significantly influenced his behavior, contributing to his bandmates’ decision to distance themselves. Lambesis expressed, “I wasn’t going to talk about it because I didn’t want to let anybody know how deeply unhealthy things were. I was trying to maintain the relationship and kept everything bottled up.” His admission highlights the emotional toll that personal struggles can inflict on professional relationships.

Lambesis Discusses Accountability and Bandmate Departures

Reflecting on the situation, Lambesis noted the irony that the collapse of his relationship coincided with his bandmates’ exit. He emphasized that he does not blame them for leaving, as they felt there was no resolution for the issues he was facing. “The solution to my relationship problems arose right when they decided to step away,” he explained. He acknowledged that his bandmates were not privy to the full extent of his struggles, partly because he tends to isolate himself during difficult times. Furthermore, he admitted that his past, which includes a serious legal issue involving an attempted murder charge over a decade ago, was a burden that his bandmates were understandably reluctant to confront again.

Consequently, Lambesis felt compelled to internalize his relational issues even further, complicating his ability to communicate with those around him. He acknowledged that his bandmates had witnessed arguments with Dany during tours and had raised concerns when he and Dany would go off together for extended periods of time.

Understanding the Roots of Toxic Relationships

Lambesis shared profound insights into why he tends to enter into unhealthy and codependent relationships, attributing this pattern to his struggle with the emotional void left by the loss of his relationship with his children. While he recognizes this tendency, he also stated that he does not expect sympathy from others. “I understand that this criticism is valid,” he said, noting that he has had ample opportunities to heal but often shied away from confronting the issue. “It’s been twelve years since my arrest, and I’ve only acknowledged the pain of that loss a few times,” he reflected, shedding light on the emotional complexities he continues to navigate.

Envisioning the Future of As I Lay Dying

As the conversation progressed, Lambesis articulated his commitment to continue with As I Lay Dying, emphasizing that his passion for creating music remains his primary driving force. However, he refrained from delving into specific plans for the band’s future, as he feels it is essential to focus on his personal healing journey and address the relational codependency that has affected him for so long. “My current mission is to pursue healing, even if it feels uncomfortable to share my emotions and struggles,” he stated. Furthermore, he expressed a desire to acknowledge the challenges he has faced over the years. “I don’t seek pity; I want to confront my issues openly,” he concluded, highlighting his determination to overcome the barriers that have held him back.

To gain further insights into Lambesis’s journey, watch the full episode below.

Tim Lambesis Opens Up in His First Interview After Band Departures